I feel a bit like I’ve checked out of life lately. That I’m on auto pilot just trying to make it through the day.
I’m incredibly driven by routine. Mondays I go to the gym. Back in the day (like a month ago), Mondays also meant blogging for the week. Then on Tuesdays I had yoga. And not just any yoga class I could get to that day, but a specific class at a specific time. Then I come home and make a good dinner. The routine goes on and on. For me, routine is critical. When I lose my routine for even a day it screws me up for days, even weeks.
I think that’s what’s happening here. I’m not sure how the routine got off-kilter. It could be the increased presence of DD, which I mentioned in my blog swap post. Obviously having someone else around throws my personal routine off. Work hasn’t helped. The past week or so have been busy as things get added to the to-do list quicker than they get crossed off. I’ve sacrificed gym and yoga time to stay at work a bit later, but that just makes it harder for me to get back into the groove, which then makes me cranky. I’m not working out, I’m not eating right (or eating at all really), and I’m generally lethargic. It’s a vicious circle. To fix one, I need to fix them all, and to fix them all, I need my routine back.
My goal this week was to check back into life and try to shed the lethargy. But I feel like I’ve just perpetuated the fog I’ve been in. I haven’t had energy to pack my lunch (which is usually a near daily habit). I’ve tried to get to yoga twice this week and been thwarted both times. I’ve wanted to get back to the blog, and have had lots of half-formed thoughts to get me started, but not enough energy to flesh them out.
I know I’ll snap out of it. I just need a fresh week to reacclimate to my routine. I thought this week would be it, but I was wrong. Maybe next?
To be fair, it hasn’t been all Debbie Downer up in here. In an effort to end this on a high note (and also because I don’t know how else to end it, this really started as one of those half-formed thoughts), here are a few things that have gone right despite the lack of routine in my world.
- A trip to David’s Bridal in search of a last minute bridesmaid dress to replace one I’d planned to wear came to a successful end. A clearance dress off the rack fit me like a glove.
- Upcoming Tigers games. DD and I got a partial season package that will start up here in a week or so. I’ll gladly work my routine around hot dogs and warm evenings in the ball park!
- A road trip to the wedding referenced above. I’d been dreading it a bit — the 8 hours in the car, NOT the wedding itself — but now that all the plans are made, I can finally look forward to the journey.
Actually, May brings lots of fun events and before I know it, it will be June, which promises to be equally jam-packed.
Which is good. As long as I can get in a yoga class or two and get back to some sort of meaningful eating habits. Otherwise, it’s clear I may spontaneously combust.