Oh, Facebook

Facebook and I are having a bit of a throw down lately. Each day, I feel more and more as if etiquette has gone out the window.

I realize that proper grammar, is like, SO 2000, but seriously? Use capital letters and punctuation once in awhile!

I’m referring to a cousin, who, each time I read his status updates, I want to drive the 12 hours to Nebraska just to smack him upside the head. A recent update:

ok back to my game and finding food then who knows today is gonna be boring

I don’t even know what to do with that sentence. He couldn’t be bothered to reach his right ring finger down on the keyboard and throw in a period somewhere? I know it’s too much to as for a cleverly placed dash or ellipse, but c’mon! A period is all I’m asking for!!!

This kid is 21 years old. He should know better. It makes me sad that kids today have this level of grammatical expertise. Because you know this isn’t just a cool thing to do on Facebook. I’d bet money this is how he turns in his term papers. I’ve never thought about unfriending a blood relative, but he’s got me seriously considering it.

If I’ve ignored you once, chances are I will continue to ignore you. TAKE. THE. HINT.

I am (well, WAS) friends with someone who used to work at my office and who, truth be told, I didn’t really know. Couldn’t even tell you what she looked like, don’t remember when she worked there, yada yada. But several other co-workers are friends, and I’m a friend whore, so I friended her when I received her request.

She’s an entrepreneur who is apparently using Facebook as a marketing medium. Fine. But when she repeatedly (and by repeatedly I mean EVERY. DAY.) invites me to become a “fan” of her “page” and I repeatedly (and by repeatedly I mean EVERY. DAY.) ignore the request, you’d think she’d take the hint.

Or not. So then I resorted to unfriending her. She’s the first person I’ve ever unfriended in all of my social networking history. We’re talking way back to MySpace days. But desperate times call for extreme Facebook action.

And guess what? The next day? She invited me to “fan” her “page”. AGAIN. At which point I began to get slightly creeped out. Why was she stalking me? Why was I so critical to her business that she NEEDED me to be a fan?!

It was then that a colleague reminded me that she’d recommended me as a freelancer for some writing the Facebook Crazy needed. At which point I felt bad and felt that maybe I should become a fan of her page and friend her again. But then I remembered that there’s a such thing as e-mail, and if she knows how to continually invite me to her page (a very impersonal communication), she can certainly send a personal e-mail.

So every day, I continue to hit “Ignore”. Perhaps I’m shooting myself in the foot denying potential business for myself. But if someone can’t remember common business etiquette, then they need more help than I can offer.

Babies. All. The. Time.

I have a best friend. She’s the one I go visit every Labor Day. She just had a baby. Don’t get me wrong, I get the whole “babies change everything” motto.

Best Friend just got on Facebook. I was totally geeked. Finally, we could keep in touch more than the occasional e-mail or visit. I could hear about her life, and sure, her baby’s, too.

It’s become apparent to me that the only reason she joined Facebook is to have an online Baby Book, because that’s the only thing she talks about. Aside from a brief status update relating to her latest Netflix, it’s babies 24/7.

I’m happy to see photos of the little muffin and coo and coddle just as much as the next Facebook-er. But I miss my friend. And this is just a daily reminder that she and I now lead completely different lives.

As the stories add up, it’s becoming apparent to me that I need to take some dramatic action. Maybe unfriend a few more people. Maybe hide their updates so I don’t receive every single alert about THE! CUTEST! BABY! IN! THE! WHOLE! WORLD!

And to the haters — I get that my Facebooking may in turn annoy people. My updates are largely uninteresting and I may be guilty of over-sharing on occasion. But, at least Iknow how to use proper punctuation and can take a hint when I’m not wanted. Just as I may unfriend you, you are more than welcome to unfriend me.

That’s equal opportunity Facebooking, y’all.

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12 Comments

Filed under peeves, rambling nature, rants, relationships

12 responses to “Oh, Facebook

  1. justatitch

    I basically hate FB, but can’t tear myself away. I have written posts about how much I hate the way people use FB (particularly the babies thing) but I differ in that I get sad if people I am fairly good friends with unfriend me. I need a thicker FB skin, I suppose. Great entry!

    I saw your post and many others! This really is the hot topic these days…I felt the need to get on the bandwagon šŸ™‚

  2. The thing I hate the most is when couples interact and profess their love and use pet names right out there in Facebook. They can’t do that at home? They have to bring that out in public? Because that’s what Facebook is, public. They are sick.

    Oh so true! Though, now that I think of it…does posting a photo of DD in a snuggie count as sappy sweetness? At least I didn’t refer to him as Pookie when I did it šŸ™‚

  3. Ha ha ha. A lot of my husband’s FB friends have babies/kids now, and all they do is update about them as well. It makes him crazy!

    I had bad grammar, ANYWHERE. Sure, we all make mistakes from time to time, but no capital letters? No commas? Ugh.

  4. Ha ha. And of course, I mistype “had” instead of “hate”!

    Totally cool…I was terrified I made some error as I ranted on about grammar errors. I’m sure I did! But as you said, it’s one thing to have an error here or there, or even to purposefully use improper grammar for style/effect. But to be lazy enough to just not care?! Ugh.

  5. Man. The FB is getting some serious hate around the blogosphere lately. I wonder if the site has finally passed its prime?? So many people I know never sign on anymore, have reduced their friends list by the dozens, untagged hundreds of photos, ceased status updates, etc., etc.

    The book of faces just ain’t what it used to be…

    I know, now it’s all about Twitter šŸ˜‰

  6. Why not just IGNORE the people who are bugging you. I’m pretty sure you can ignore their news feeds (i.e., status updates, photo updates, etc.) … and then if you’re interested in what they’re up to, you can just visit their page. It’s one way to keep up with them on your terms, not theirs.

  7. Oh and by IGNORE, I mean, there’s a button you can click to ignore certain people. I think it’s on the upper right corner of any news feed that pops up under their name … I think.

    Oh I do! And they still send me page requests. So I still have to be bothered to hit IGNORE every. single. time. Where’s the BLOCK function?!

  8. FB can be fun sometimes, but my participation is intermittent. Hate all the dumb “send a plant” apps though.

    My pet peeve is people who try to friend you and their profile picture is of a BABY. And, inevitably, those are girls from high school who don’t post their maiden names, so you’re like “Hannah WHO? Do I know a fat baby called Hannah?”

    It’s not the plants anymore. Now it’s all about mafia and farms. Because those are so cool.

  9. walkingonsunshine18

    LOL Great post! I’m totally with you on the grammar thing! UGH! It is really annoying!

    Seriously!!!

  10. My niece is either a retarded person or just plain stupid. Her status updates:

    ah miss meh huni n i lov hm lol all much the time lol i aim bord whishin mi huni wud get on the online lol kiszes and shit lol

    Her mother’s (my brother’s wife) response isn’t any better:

    get ur fat ass in the kitchen n do my dishes lol you a ho! ou don’t have no honey except wats in my kabinets. get off the fkin phone lol

    Seriously: that is thier conversations.

    That is just wrong on so, so many levels. You’ve one-upped me, my dear. Congratulations šŸ™‚

  11. Can I be the jerk here and ask if “TAKE. THE. HINT.”, “Babies. All. The. Time.” and “THE! CUTEST! BABY! IN! THE! WHOLE! WORLD!” are complete, grammatically-correct sentences?

    Supergirl, I’m a grammar nazi as much as you, but nothing remains the same. Culture, they shift…and its up to us to either move with it…or die trying. (Fitty taught me that).

    Don’t be so frustrated. Think of facebook etiquette as YOUR version of facebook etiquette. There are many versions out there. None are right nor are they wrong.

    All I’m saying is don’t be a playa hater just because people communicate differently than you.

    Those sentences were all about style and hence, grammatical rules do not apply šŸ™‚

  12. Oh my gosh this made me laugh because I can relate to it so well. I cannot stand my brother’s messages because they’re so badly done and spelled. It’s like, dude, I love you but seriously stop!

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